All human beings, one way or another, experience various sorts of emotional pain. Our defenses among these negative stimuli matters with different factors on how we are engaged to our environmental, intrapersonal and interpersonal field. Survival mechanisms were handled differently among ourselves. Note with the degree of betrayal, some would succumb to all sorts of negativism; emotional eating, rants, curses or even suicidal ideations. No matter how hard our ordeals will be, God designed as to be invincible enough to surpass a heart ache brought by the ones we once called "our better half".
Technical reasons why relationships don't work does not only fall to the premises of "one loves to many, the other loves too much" but also to some degree where in there is a phase wherein a couple experience "uncrossed mind set". It happens when two committed people reached a phase experiencing change of interest on how they will head on to their lives generally which coincidentally the other cannot accept or understand, together with their own perspectives. Instead of losing your own identity, regardless of how committed you are, you tend to sacrifice the choice to conitinue loving your partner because of your own little analysis that it won't work, that in the end you might lose yourself and flooded with the "what ifs" and "what might have beens" if you chose the other way.
Aftermath of the tremendous separations and plead for utmost freedom, one suffers a massive series of sympathetic and parsympathetic ganglionic interplay, to speak of Stages of Grief:Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance (Kubler-Ross).Revealing the pathophysiology of heartaches, we often say "I love you from the bottom of my hypothalamus". This response is mediated by a specific neurotransmiter (mostly dopamine, endorphins), fire down to our peripheral nervous system to different structures, particularly mechanoreceptors (merkels disk, pacinian corpuscles). This mechanoreceptors are abundant in our lips and the ventral part of our hands. The very reason why it feels good to kiss, to touch and to embrace. Our Limbic System which is the center of our emotions, hunger and sexual stimuli and also responsible in mediating these particular reactions (Siegelman et al). Part of it is the Hypothalamus which also process our emotions, thinking and memory in the same loop. If our thinking and our emotions has the possibility to share the same field in our brain, there could also be the chance that we can totally influence its mechanism to divert the negative loop to a positive one.
Neurolinguistic Programming was formulated by Richard Bandler in 1970s. It is an approach to psychotherapy and organizational change based on "a model of interpersonal communication chiefly concerned with the relationship between successful patterns of behavior and the subjective experiences (esp. patterns of thought) underlying them" and "a system of alternative therapy based on this which seeks to educate people in self-awareness and effective communication, and to change their patterns of mental and emotional behavior (NLP; wikipedia.org).
Neurolinguistic simply defines "language of our brain", programming is the "mind set"(Andreas et al). With this approach we can easily guide and enculcate the "cortical point" where in anyone subjected to the negative loop will gain balance along the course of the therapy. Based on my experience on several patients I tried to incorporate this practice, it could also help in identifying somatic bearings interfaced with emotional pathways. Healing the body while healing the mind. My distinct interaction on this, I tend to play an imaginary series of algorithm pattern of dichotomous field of loops (positive and negative) flashing on the patient's forehead while having a conversation on him/her. This imagery helps me to identify certain reactions, possible choices and predicted outcomes in the now or beforehand. These reacti0ns were woven together to a purpose of annihilating the negative loops discretely while guiding his/her cortical senses to balance and live accordingly. Mind resetting so to speak.
There are only few NLP practitioners in the Philippines, and one of them is my mentor; Dr. Strix Toledo. I've seen a lot of his works other than NLP that can be useful in the medical field. The first time I witnessed his work on NLP, it really shocked me, but now I'm here explaining the science of it. NLP is one of the practices in Contemporary Medicine that some will scrutinize and will find it disturbing, but if your mind has the capacity to sort out the anatomy and physiology of it. Makes sense. I would love to gather 20-30 human beings that is presently in excruciating emotional pain and share NLP with them. If anyone throw you a mundane question "Do you have a remedy/medication for the broken hearted?", YES THERE IS. In Heaven you have God, on Earth you have NLP.
"We can choose what software to install in our Neurology. And since neuroplasticity exists, when we change our minds over extended period of time, we literally change our neuron connections and the structure of the brain itself"
-Dr. Strix Toledo MD, BT, DO